Behavioural Facades

The transparency of truth will always find its way to the surface and for all to see. 

When this comes to behaviour, eventually the sides of a person often hidden from sight or controlled, will become obvious over time. 

The ability to fake a certain behaviour can be done only for so long before the person requires emotional balance and will return to their natural state. This often has the good, the bad, the happy, the moody and whatever it was they were desperately trying to hide.

While this is prevalent in narcissists and often, they can fake their behaviour for as long as 12-18 months. It is also important to keep in mind they lack empathy and the care-factor of an every day person.

Couple's Portrait

So, when discussing an every day, average person with typical stresses, latent trauma to an almost effective facade, eventually, who they are behind closed doors will filter through. 

However, the problem with facades and unconsciously faking behaviour is that an imbalance of emotions will be created. Consider the analogy of a dam where all of the emotions have been blocked but here and there (more often than they realise) heightened parts of emotion will seep through, like water finding a way through cracks in the dam wall. This will be intense and typically short lived. 

Students Discussing Paper

On the receiving end, the person may come across as though they have OCD tendencies (pick on small areas and lament on them almost obsessively). This can make the person feel judged or even interpret this behaviour as passive aggressive. 

When the behaviour reaches this stage it means it is a matter of time before the facade, like the dam, gains more cracks and eventually breaks. 

However, it does not have to go this way. Emotions are not horrible, uncontrollable things plaguing the body and the mind. They are powerful and beautiful, and they always have a purpose. 

Blocking emotions may seem the best way to reduce pain, but it does not. Like water and cracks, they will always find a way out. 

Rather than running away from what can help, stop; breathe and ask how happy the current state is. The way out can be taken slowly and gently. The first step is to simply acknowledge things, life could be better and that there is a choice.


by Hally Rhiannon-Nammu

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